Category Archives: Weirdry

Accepting the Inner Flame.

image
Fire-pit at Thorsson's house 2015

I’m an impatient being.  Always have been and always will be.  I was even born a month premature, yet I survived, when time was that I wouldn’t have.

I have always been close to my emotions, especially the fire inside. 

That’s not to say I’m a violent or an angry person, I am the most laid back and chilled out guy you can ever hope to meet.  Unless you are technology, then the spark within becomes a full blown meltdown where my blood boils and I might as well grow claws and shred every piece of wiring and circuitry apart.  Many is the time I wanted to smash my mobile phone against the nearest wall and destroy this tool for not being quick enough, or autocorrecting the wrong words.  If I could just give in to my beast, it would be sooooooo easy.

Of course, the fault is actually mine.  Just because my aptitude for any device isn’t the sharpest, it isn’t the machine I’m angry with.  I’m projecting the anger with myself onto whatever I’m using when I should know better.  But when I press something and all I get is the Whirlygig of Doom, out comes my battle-cry: “Oh, Come ON!!!”

On those days where the computers at work, my mobile phone on the bus ride home and my home PC are being slow and I see more than my fair share of the Whirlygig of Doom all on the same day, I stop. Turn everything off and leave them well alone.

When I was younger, this anger was taken out with my fists hitting the kitchen sides or the nearest wall.

For a time, I doused the flames.  I simply walked through life, nothing much phased me and even those times of intense emotion were so…… Wet.  I look back at the very first blog I wrote and read it with disdain.  What a fucking pussy I was back then!  My inner fire, for several years was merely a glowing ember almost reduced to blackened ash.  Yet we must know the dark before we can know the light.  And when I wrote that first blog post, I was lost and confused.  And I got over it.  See? It was there! Right then.  I looked back at my past self and rebuked him, I can’t deny the person I was as that was a part of me.  And still is.  The past can show us who we don’t want to be.

Of all the things in the world to breathe air into that dying ember, it was Druidry that blew into that spark, only for it to catch on and to flare up,  and ignite once again.  Let me make it clear that I am in no way saying that Druidry “Saved me”.  When I began this blog back in 2012, I was already studying and learning Druidry.  I had hit a low point was all and it wasn’t until I was working with the element of fire things in motion began to change things.

  I began my Bardic course with having to use a candle instead of a “Piss poor fire”.  It was working with the element of fire in my Fire-Weaving ritual that gave me signs of dragons and unexpectedly changed something within me (that’s when the ember was blown on and then caught fire once more….), the end of my Bardic course saw me burn my thumb on a flame and as I sucked it, the metaphor of wisdom was not lost on me.  Reconnecting with my inner fire brought back my passion (acting) and returned my enthusiasm.  It is a fire with caution, as it also brought back my impatience and spiky nature.  This has cost me my resolve at work as I have damaged property more than once in the past few weeks! 
At my day job, Del-boy, the Asst. Manager has warned me I need to calm down and not get so wound up.  And he’s right, I’m better than this.

Used correctly, I can create new material under pressure, make decisions to ‘get it done’ or even clean shit up.  That’s the thing with anger, for the most part, in our society it is destructive.  But it can keep you going.

The inner fire isn’t always a bad thing, it’s what keeps me creative, whether with my acting or playing with character nuances during line-learning, devising a talk (or an all-consuming blog post I just have to share with the world) or even plotting the next chapter to inflict upon my players in my Vampire: The Masquerade RPG Chronicle.  Once inspired by something, the spark of Awen will catch my flame and then I have to act on it, be it research of a deity or an old story or look into the facts of something people take for granted as true just because we thought it was (The Oak King, Holly King model was made up by Robert Graves, but people take it as gospel- Discuss). It also gives me that urge to question everything.

When there’s passion, energy and conviction, the flames are burning brightly indeed.

Romantically speaking, I can be warm, comforting and entirely devoted.  Presently, my fires of the heart are whimsical.  I seem to develop crushes on women, but then these flames of fancy fade out.  I may love my friends, but I am not in love with anyone. For now, in my life, that’s ok. 

Once upon a time, I called myself the ‘Impulsive Flame’ I am not being egotistical when I say I radiate a warmness, because I do.  And people are attracted to the light and warmth, but getting too close can result in burning.  I can be prickly with even those I allow to come close,   I endeavour to control my fire, but like the actual alchemical element itelf, sometimes it simply ignites.  And fire can also be cleansing, sometimes you just need to let things out, I just don’t ever want to take it out on anyone.

Its not that I don’t need to learn to control it, I already know how.  I just need to master when to reign the flames in and know when to let them flare up. But I can never quench them again, to do so is to deny myself when fire is a great teacher in responsibility and will.

Accepting the Inner Flame.

image
Fire-pit at Thorsson's house 2015

I’m an impatient being.  Always have been and ways will be.  I was even born a month premature, yet I survived, when time was that I wouldn’t have.

I have always been close to my emotions, especially the fire inside. 

That’s not to say I’m a violent or an angry person, I am the most laid back and chilled out guy you can ever hope to meet.  Unless you are technology, then the spark within becomes a full blown meltdown where my blood boils and I might as well grow claws and shred every piece of wiring and circuitry apart.  Many is the time I wanted to smash my mobile phone against the nearest wall and destroy this tool for not being quick enough, or autocorrecting the wrong words.  If I could just give in to my beast, it would be sooooooo easy.

Of course, the fault is actually mine.  Just because my aptitude for any device isn’t the sharpest, it isn’t the machine I’m angry with.  I’m projecting the anger with myself onto whatever I’m using when I should know better.  But when I press something and all I get is the Whirlygig of Doom, out comes my battle-cry: “Oh, Come ON!!!”

On those days where the computers at work, my mobile phone on the bus ride home and my home PC are being slow and I see more than my fair share of the Whirlygig of Doom all on the same day, I stop. Turn everything off and leave them well alone.

When I was younger, this anger was taken out with my fists hitting the kitchen sides or the nearest wall.

For a time, I doused the flames.  I simply walked through life, nothing much phased me and even those times of intense emotion were so…… Wet.  I look back at the very first blog I wrote and read it with disdain.  What a fucking pussy I was back then!  My inner fire, for several years was merely a glowing ember almost reduced to blackened ash.  Yet we must know the dark before we can know the light.  And when I wrote that first blog post, I was lost and confused.  And I got over it.  See? It was there! Right then.  I looked back at my past self and rebuked him, I can’t deny the person I was as that was a part of me.  And still is.  The past can show us who we don’t want to be.

Of all the things in the world to breathe air into that dying ember, it was Druidry that blew into that spark, only for it to catch on and to flare up,  and ignite once again.  Let me make it clear that I am in no way saying that Druidry “Saved me”.  When I began this blog back in 2012, I was already studying and learning Druidry.  I had hit a low point was all and it wasn’t until I was working with the element of fire things in motion began to change things.

  I began my Bardic course with having to use a candle instead of a “Piss poor fire”.  It was working with the element of fire in my Fire-Weaving ritual that gave me signs of dragons and unexpectedly changed something within me (that’s when the ember was blown on and then caught fire once more….), the end of my Bardic course saw me burn my thumb on a flame and as I sucked it, the metaphor of wisdom was not lost on me.  Reconnecting with my inner fire brought back my passion (acting) and returned my enthusiasm.  It is a fire with caution, as it also brought back my impatience and spiky nature.  This has cost me my resolve at work as I have damaged property more than once in the past few weeks! 
At my day job, Del-boy, the Asst. Manager has warned me I need to calm down and not get so wound up.  And he’s right, I’m better than this.

Used correctly, I can create new material under pressure, make decisions to ‘get it done’ or even clean shit up.  That’s the thing with anger, for the most part, in our society it is destructive.  But it can keep you going.

The inner fire isn’t always a bad thing, it’s what keeps me creative, whether with my acting or playing with character nuances during line-learning, devising a talk (or an all-consuming blog post I just have to share with the world) or even plotting the next chapter to inflict upon my players in my Vampire: The Masquerade RPG Chronicle.  Once inspired by something, the spark of Awen will catch my flame and then I have to act on it, be it research of a deity or an old story or look into the facts of something people take for granted as true just because we thought it was (The Oak King, Holly King model was made up by Robert Graves, but people take it as gospel- Discuss). It also gives me that urge to question everything.

When there’s passion, energy and conviction, the flames are burning brightly indeed.

Romantically speaking, I can be warm, comforting and entirely devoted.  Presently, my fires of the heart are whimsical.  I seem to develop crushes on women, but then these flames of fancy fade out.  I may love my friends, but I am not in love with anyone. For now, in my life, that’s ok. 

Once upon a time, I called myself the ‘Impulsive Flame’ I am not being egotistical when I say I radiate a warmness, because I do.  And people are attracted to the light and warmth, but getting too close can result in burning.  I can be prickly with even those I allow to come close,   I endeavour to control my fire, but like the actual alchemical element itelf, sometimes it simply ignites.  And fire can also be cleansing, sometimes you just need to let things out, I just don’t ever want to take it out on anyone.

Its not that I don’t need to learn to control it, I already know how.  I just need to master when to reign the flames in and know when to let them flare up. But I can never quench them again, to do so is to deny myself when fire is a great teacher in responsibility and will.

Here be Dragons…

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Earth Dragon, art by Bill Worthington.

Ah, 2016, I’ve been expecting you.

With all the strong winds we had this winter, I got the feeling that the winds of change had already arrived; eagerly pushing 2015 out of the way as if 2016 couldn’t wait to get here. 

2015 has been a busy year for me.  I got moved store (again) and have even taken steps to help me back on the road of acting.

Comparing to last year’s reading, how did things play out?

Venom: I lost my cat, Loki.  She was my companion, my little girl and my pain in the arse all at once. I had her put down after she was attacked by a Fox as her chances of survival were extremely slim.  Not a day goes by without me thinking of her. 

I broke the heart of my friend and fellow Grove mate, River.  I thought I was ready for a new relationship and after three months, realised I wasn’t.  So I ended it and hurt her badly.  Looking back on it, I see now that was what’s called a ‘rebound’.  We have spoken since and says she has forgiven me.  I wouldn’t say we are the friends we used to be, but at least we are civil now. 
  The venom was my broken heart and the lesson of Adder reversed is to use the poison that harms into one that cures.  Loki’s death reminded me of the savage side of Nature, it was a serious wound that was brought through the cycle of survival.  I think it would have been worse if I found her after getting run over by a car.
  As terrible as breaking up with River was, things happened in motion to change her life for the better, from what she told me, she has discovered Buddhism which has taught her to let go of the past and embrace the future. 
  I learned a lot about myself from this experience and now know who I am, as well as who I don’t want to be.

Honey: The card of Bee represents community, celebration and organisation.  2015 was a very social year for me, I am blessed with many friends wether it is my Grove, my housemate, my workmates, both my social and spiritual circles.  I even left Pagan Pride in an official capacity, in a good place. 
  With the Am Dram group, I bonded really well with my fellow cast and crew in the One-Acts of that summer.  I spent NYE with Cludgie’s family and mutual friends. It was Cludgie who gave me the final push to go for the role I auditioned for and got.  The director had previously asked if I’d be interested in reading for it and I thought of every reason not to.  I’m glad Cludgie talked me round.
 
Three major creative things happened this year too: me, Strider and Dumbledore got together and formed our storytelling group “Tales From the Fireside”, a separate venture from our Grove that was described by one event organiser as “I knew you’d be good, I didn’t expect you to be awesome”.
  The other was joining the Actors Workshop here in Notts.  Making some good friends and progress in my performing skills.
  And filming the Promo of Gallows Bait in Sherwood Forest, dressed as a proper highwayman for two days!

2015 was for me a year of discovery, having courage enough to do what it is I want to actually do (and sowing the seeds for it to happen) and being surrounded by wonderful people, old and new.  I also did a lot of guest speaking this year, touching on new subjects for me as well as revisiting old ones.

Dragons: I was quite hungover on New Year’s Day when I drew the card for 2016 and as soon as I saw what my focus for this year was, I said in my best George Takei voice: ‘Ohhh Myyyyyyy’ Earth Dragon or ‘Draig-Talamh’ is the card of accessing your inner potential, as well as recognising the potential in others. 
Here’s hoping 2016 will be a very productive year!

Spirit of the place?

I came to the end of my Bardic course back in February, although, life had its own events and I am still in my ‘gathering my notes before I submit my review’ stage.

Going through my journals (I’m currently on my 5th), I found this entry of going to the stone circle at Froggart’s Edge back in September 2010! I’d only just joined OBOD and this was just before meeting the Grove, for the first time, with Lady Morgana at Alban Elfed of that year:

Performing the Bardic Ceremony (which back then, for me, was peace to the quarters, drawing the circle and saying the Druid’s prayer- swot that I was/am and then making the rest up as I felt appropriate) and sitting in the middle of the circle, facing South.  I closed my eyes, steadied my breathing and performed the LBE…

‘..I began to receive certain words, Taurus, Eye of Taurus (Aldebaran), Silvanus Vernicum, even Herne.  Druids and witches celebrating at night (the birch trees to the West entrance were covered in clooties).  I found myself going deeper, to try and communicate with the spirit of the circle that was worshipped so long ago.  I saw the night and a girl hiding behind the rocks.  I bade her to come forward and that I meant no harm.  She was young, about 16-19 yrs old.  She had long black waving curls and large brown eyes, dusky skin.  She seemed wrapped in shadow, only her face and skin were exposed.  She was beautiful in a fierce and savage way, not provocative.  Asking her name, she said she was called “Annis”.  She nodded when I asked if she was the spirit of the circle and wrapped the shadows around her like a cloak. She told me this in a soft, cracked voice that became stronger as she went on:

“I am the Goddess and the sacrificed,
I am the queen and the offering,
I am the lover and the mother,
I am the dark that greets the light of the morning Sun,
I am the gift along with the bull,
These stones lie forgotten in their use.
Others come and worship Herne, he is not here, they are wrong.
My name is Annis!”

She stands wrapped in the dark, her eyes wide and her face proud.  When I see her face and skin its like I’m seenig her being glowed by the light of a fire.  She disappears…..  Coming to, I dispel the circle and pull out my runes in answer to whether I can come here again.  The rune is Othila, rune of heritage, homestead and inheritance.  I leave an offering of water in the egg shaped hole.’

Now, this was before the time I knew about Black Annis, associated with Leicestershire.  I did a bit of research when I got back to my parents and found the following:

Froggarts Edge Stone Circle, aka Stoke Flat.
Entrance is SSW.
Built in Bronze Age (2300bc-700bc), burial Urn was discovered by Duke of Rutland in 1939 AD.

Female energy detected according to HedgeDruid.com.

As for the Eye of Taurus, I discovered that in the Age of Taurus, the constellation marked the point of the Vernal Equinox between 4000bc-1700bc.  Supposedly, the VE was the New Year of that time. 

No remains of slaughtered animals or people, though. –  30th September 2010.

Looking back at the entry, I still remember that day well: the bright Sun as my family hiked, the strong winds of that year blowing my locks back.  I would have given offerings differently, in the form of milk or a biscuit with honey on it at the base of the stone (so Nature could take it in her own way).  I would have liked to have asked Annis what actually went on there.

Thing is, I had actually heard of Annis before.  At least, I had come across another version.  Written as ‘Black Annis’ in a book that I own*.  Although the description is a lot more sinister than the being I encountered; and Black Annis was based in Leicestershire.

So I was a little surprised when the spirit gave me her name and it was THAT name.  Up until then, I had simply forgotten about Black Annis, dismissing her as a bogeyman-vampire type monster….. Fool that I am.

It wasn’t until much later through conversations with Tatterhood that I learned more about Black Annis and the local traditions associated with her.  And so I wonder if she is in fact a local form of the Cailleach? More about that another time.

I am not an astronomer or astrologer, I found my information regarding Taurus marking the Vernal Equinox at this site since 2010: : http://www.skyscript.co.uk/taurus_myth.html

The Hedge Druid link is still active and has been updated, although the bit about ‘female energy detected’ is no longer there.

I have a feeling that my research back then was looking up on Wikipedia, which although not reliable, is great for finding sources.  If any of my readers do actually know the workings and calculations involved with the sidereal plane and can verify as to whether or not Aldebaran and the constellation Taurus DID mark the vernal equinox somewhere between 4000-1700BC (Which would be a little early for the circle as it was thought to have been built in the Bronze age, see above) then that would be a nice “hit” indeed.  Plus I’ll happily announce it in another blog post and give full credit, whether the outcome is positive or negative.  If I’m wrong, I’m wrong, simple.  I think its doubtful that Annis’ people would have used the names Aldebaran and Taurus as we are talking about an insular tribe who probably used their own names and words for the stars and constellations.

*David Rankine & Sorita D’Este, Isle of the Many Gods, An A-Z of the Pagan Gods & Goddesses worshipped in Ancient Britain during the First Millenium CE through to the Middle Ages, Avalonia, London, 2007, p.82.

The Legends of Wanker Bill (aka ‘The Stuff Young Boys Come Up With’

Back in the merry month of May I wrote this piece on the woodland back where I grew up.  I also mentioned Wanker Bill and said I’d write a piece on it.  And here it is!

Woolley Wood, the haunt of Wanker Bill?
Woolley Wood, the haunt of Wanker Bill?

I wasn’t sure how widespread in Wincobank the tales of Wanker Bill were.  I contacted some friends to see if they knew anything about it, alas it seems only me and my brother remember it.  Even then my brother only heard of the name and that’s it.  Either way, when I was a young boy in the local Scout Troop, the tales were enough to scare three lads back to the HQ during a night time game in the woods.

On reflection, I’m convinced that the WB stories were made up to scare the younger boys who joined the troop:

Tale 1:
There was a little girl who lived on Newman Road.  One day, she went to go and play in the shed in the back garden.  This time, when she went in, she wasn’t alone… Huddled in the corner was a tramp who called himself “Bill”.  Taking pity on the homeless squatter, the little girl would smuggle food into the shed for him.
  The mum had caught onto something being a little odd and watched her daughter, so she followed her into the shed to find the tramp eating biscuits whilst wanking* in front of her daughter…

Tale 2:
Wanker Bill is a man who walks around Wincobank Hill and Woolley Wood with his two dogs.  He only walks around at night and without a torch.  He lies in wait until there is someone going through the woods alone, then he sets his dogs on you.  They chase you, knock you down and pin you to the ground until Wanker Bill comes along and bums** you…

So, during the years of 1993-95, young boys were telling these tales about anal rape and child molestation.  No wonder these stories were enough to scare the hell out of three boys during a night time activity I was present at:

The whole troop was playing a Wide-Game, I forget which version*** although I think it was the one where the boys were split into two teams and we had to put tokens into the opposing team’s camp without getting caught.  The Scout Troop loved Wide Games and would really go to town on it, some lads even buying camoflauged outfits (myself included) or even camo-face paint.  Come the end of the night, the Troop Leader would blow his whistle with three long blasts, signalling the end of the game and for all of the troop to get to the meeting point we all knew.  After a head count, there were three boys missing: Mr. C, Scrubber Dave and Skaven (we were cruel in our nicknaming).  Troop Leader blasted his whistle two more courses between 5 mins each.  We were all split into teams and anyone who had a torch was asked to use it.  One team was sent off to the HQ, just in case.  We searched for about 20 mins and heard the three blasts to meet back. One of the lads from the HQ team had reported back that Mr. C, Scrubber Dave and Skaven were found at the HQ.
  “We saw Wanker Bill!” Scrubber Dave exclaimed.
“There was a man with two dogs, we thought it was Wanker Bill, so we ran back here after he’d walked past us…”
Everyone compared notes to what dog walkers went through the wood, there was a woman with a large dog and a man with two small terriers… But nothing like the heavy hounds of Wanker Bill.

One lad who was in the troop the same time I was, never heard of it.  So I’m now thinking the stories were told in my last years at the Scout Troop, 1995-96.

With the lack of response and information, I’m beginning to think that WB was less an urban myth in the making and more a practical joke I must have mis-heard some of the boys talking about all those years ago.  Or perhaps WB was the product of Scrubber Dave’s creative imagination, he did like to spin a yarn, especially when he tried to convince us all that his uncle could dodge bullets!

*Wanking: British slang for masturbation

**Bumming: British slang for anal sex, which in this case wouldn’t it make more sense for Wanker Bill to ‘wank’ on someone rather than ‘bum’ them? Not a term I normally use.

***Wide Game: a game with of the Cat and Mouse variety.  In our local scout troop, they were always at night and in the woods.  Sometimes it was teams in the woods having to catch other teams, or boys against leaders, there were various types.

Baby Numo Sighting!

SHIT! It’s real! Arrrrrrrrrggggghhhhhh!

Photo by Mark Knight
Photo by Mark Knight

BABY NUMO

Baby Numo is a cyber-spirit.  It comes when there are five of you in the room and sees you through your computer and your TV screen.  You have to face it one at a time.  Weapons won’t hurt it, but if you believe, a token of faith might make Baby Numo spare you.  Might.

Baby Numo looks into your soul and makes you face all your darkest fears, if you are impure of heart, then the screens will say ‘EVIL DETECTED’ and then you freak out as your fears consume you.

Some sweat blood, some cry out, some curl up into a ball and start gibbering.  Some disappear and are never seen again.  They have been taken by Baby Numo.  Where to? no one knows.

If you are pure of heart, the screens will say ‘NO EVIL DETECTED’ and you will be spared, your reward? your life and your sanity intact.  Your room will go black like a wall of shadow, but this will pass.  In Baby Numo’s place will be a doll for you to keep.

Its true, it happened to a friend of mine.

It started as a prank on the internet.

It started in Japan.

But Baby Numo became real because people believed.

Its all true. 

Nah, c’mon! I made Baby Numo up in a dream.  My brother, having read the original blog, here, saw this No-Face Graffiti and posted it on my FB profile with the words ‘NO EVIL DETECTED’. Clever get! I really should make this into a short story or a mini-film, lol.

‘Hear Me Roar’

I have recently come across a break down of ancient Irish law (Brehon) which shows nine ‘virtues’:

*Honour
*Justice
*Loyalty
*Courage
*Community
*Hospitality
*Gentleness
*Wisdom
*Eloquence

I could do a whole post on them, breaking them down further and explore their meanings and definitions, but I’ll do that another time.

Right now, I want to focus on just one of those virtues… Courage.

Have you ever been inspired by a sentance or a phrase? Maybe even just two or three words that seem to shout out to you and give you the kick up the ass needed?

Mine came from a tattoo.

More accurately, it’s a quote from a movie that I read on someone’s arm.

Artemis had a friend round, Sandy, who stayed with us for a couple of days.  We were chatting and seeing the tattoos on her arms, I asked if I could read the words on one of them.  And when I did, it was exactly what I needed to hear…. If reading can be classed as listening.  And here it is:

Picture of Sandy and her tattoo, used with kind permission of Sandy... I owe her pizza for this!
Picture of Sandy and her tattoo, used with kind permission of Sandy… I owe her pizza for this!

Full Quote: “You know, sometimes all you need is twenty seconds of insane courage. Just literally twenty seconds of just embarrassing bravery. And I promise you, something great will come of it. “
Benjamin Mee, ‘We Bought A Zoo’.

Or as Sandy put it: “… to stop being a pussy…

I have never seen the movie, as someone who worries a lot (especially about things that haven’t even happened!), this has stuck with me.  It has become my mantra for 2015.  And it is sooooo true!

We live in an age of fear.  Fear of not being accepted, fear of offending someone, fear of the future, fear of being hurt.  Fear of war, fear of being sued, fear of doing the right thing (because we end up being accused if we do… If you believe what the Newspapers say, anyway).

Courage is something that is seriously lacking in our world, boy do we need it!

One of the reasons I look to the past is that there are tales of Courage and heroism, and not all of them are centred around men and the ideology of the Male Principle.  To turn around and do what is right, to do the thing no one else can or will, to make a stand.  That takes courage.

I’m not saying we need to start running around being reckless or stupid, but what would happen if we all started acting bravely? What if we dared, on a day by day basis, to have ourselves of 20 seconds of courage?

You know the ones, right? It’s that feeling in the back of your head and in your gut.  Something happens and for a moment the world stops.  You know you need to act… Do you?

There are a number of occasions that I remember where I should have acted, but didn’t.  I believe that courage can be built up, if we have the will to do something… DO IT! 20 seconds.  That’s a lifetime in a split moment.  Don’t waste it.

Tell someone ‘No’, say ‘Yes’ to something that you’d normally be scared of.  Dare to step in when your friends argue, tell that girl you have a crush on that she’s beautiful, go and do that thing you’ve always been wanting to do but never have done (if not now, then when?).

I’m done with being unsure, like the Lion from The Wizard of Oz once he realised he had his courage already within, it is time to ROAR! *  It’s time to stop reacting and start acting.  20 seconds…. That’s all it takes.

Photo by Christian Dubstep
Photo by Christian Dubstep

*Yeah, I took the title from the Lannister family motto from Game of Thrones… Wat’cha gonna do!?